Category Archives: Fight2Win

A Grief Revisited…

This has been a tough couple of weeks emotionally. May 7th marked the day 4 years ago that my dear friend Alese Coco was ushered into the loving arms of Jesus. The next day was the 3rd Mother’s Day my Sister and I have been without my Mom. This week a dear friend saw his wife ushered into the loving arms of Jesus and on the same evening a gal I knew from The Master’s College was also ushered into the loving arms of Jesus. To top it all off tomorrow will mark 21 years since my Step-Grandfather (PaPa) dropped dead of a heart attack and went home to be with His Saviour and Hero. Around the corner is June when my Mom was ushered into those same Arms of Love.

Grief has has paid an unwelcome and unexpected visit…

These past few years May, June and July have been tough months but going forward it seems they will be tougher. The grief that has now visited the lives of others in close proximity to me is the same grief that I thought I had won over and my heart is heavy.

My heart is heavy because grief steals and shakes your confidence. My heart is heavy because grief is long lasting and ironically never truly dies. My heart is heavy because it doesn’t take much to remember the grief that stopped my life for a time and now it has stopped the lives of others whom I love and care about. The stabbing sensation just above your stomach and below your chest that produces sobs of anguish and emotional upheaval has now made it’s entrance into the hearts of dear friends and I hurt for them.

Thankfully God has constantly reminded me that Jesus wasn’t immune from grief and sorrow. Isaiah 53:3 says, “He was despised and rejected by men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not.” (ESV emphasis mine). When Lazarus died Jesus wept. The Garden of Gethsemane was no picnic either. Jesus literally bled with grief and sorrow that night. I take comfort in the fact that our Saviour and the one who set the example for us in this race that we call life, did not ignore His grief, condemn His grief or live for His grief.

What a loving and gracious God to send us His Son to set the example that grief is okay and is a part of life here on this broken, messy and jacked up earth. God could have said grief was a sin and then where would be? Instead, He allowed Lazarus to die in order to bring glory to Himself through His Son Jesus’s grief.

I can rest in Jesus, trust Jesus, love Jesus and serve Jesus during my grief knowing that “For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.” (2 Corinthians 5:21 ESV) and knowing that The Father and the Son both grieved over that event.

3 Years Of Worship

Three years ago today I wept uncontrollably when I learned that my Beloved Sister In Christ Alese Coco had been ushered into the presence of Jesus. She was and is an inspiration to everyone that learns her story. Alese and I were very good friends and while I miss our crazy adventures together, our mutual love for TV Shows (She would have LOOOVED Glee!) and our tendency to not let others in on our inside joke, what I miss most is our conversations about the Lord, and who He was in our life. I’ll miss the times when we’d play and sing a worship song over and over again (much to the annoyance of others) because it gave us a chance to sing about our Savior for a little bit longer before it was time to go home. And even though I wish we’d had a chance to sing a little longer before she went home to be with Jesus, I am (as usual) jealous of her present relationship with the Lord. Right now she (along with my Mom) gets to sing and dance in the very presence of Jesus and there will be no end… because she is home. She is safe… she is comforted and most of all she is at rest in Him.

Alese Coco – 731 Days And Counting


Often times, it’s hard to imaging life without someone that is right next to you. But almost 3 years ago I did, and the emptiness that I felt was crushing. I was with my dear friend, Alese Coco. We had been talking about the latest challenges she faced with her treatment for Hodgkin’s Disease. Alese had already endured so much but was still as feisty and as funny as ever. “If you see a nurse walking by with a needle that has something in it, chances are it’s for me!” she said jokingly about her recent stay in a hospital. I laughed with her and was instantly hit by just how much Alese had changed my life.

When my Mom had fist been diagnosed with Stage IV Ovarian Cancer I hated hospitals and had not desire to joke about them, or their doctors or their nurses or their needles. And yet Alese, who had seen more doctor’s, nurses and needles than most of us would see in two lifetimes, still could joke about them. Alese had a strange and puzzling peace about them all… it certainly exceeded my understanding… even when she died 2 years ago today.

There was no fight that Alese did not think she could win, there was no obstacle that she did not think she could overcome, there was no “setback” that could set her back and it was all because there was no one she trusted more that Jesus Christ. I miss her a lot, and I’m glad that she and my Mom get to spend time with Jesus and with each other. In fact, I’m envious… that during the 731 days we’ve spent without Alese, she has been spending time with Jesus.

Pray for the Coco family and when you get a chance check out and learn how Alese’s story and faith is the driving force behind an organization that is committed to achieve a 100% cure rate for all patients diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma.