Have you ever been stuck on the side of the road because your car wasn’t working?
I have and it can be a pretty scary experience. You feel helpless and if you’re in an isolated area thoughts of survival aren’t too far off. Here in Southern California anything and everything that happens in life happens because of your car. Going to work, going to the store, going to see a friend, going to church etc all happens by car. There is a rather complex but vastly under-resourced public transportation system here in LA that a lot of people do use, but take one ride on any freeway between the hours of 7Am and 11AM Monday-Friday and you’ll realize that not enough people use it, nor would there be enough trains and buses if more people used it.
That being said, the car is your home for long stretches of the week and to have it stop working on you can mean big trouble.
That’s why, when I was on my way home from work the other night, that I decided to help out a stranded group of people on the side of the road.
It was pretty late in the evening and on the stretch of road we were on there was actually fog and mist out and about (or Oot and Aboot for my Canadian readers). There were three young folks in their early 20′s waving their arms as cars drove by. After making a safe U-Turn I came back around and pulled in behind their car. I was greeted by two skinny Asian men and one even skinnier Asian woman.
Our conversation went something like this:
“Thank you so much for stopping!” They all said loudly.
“So what happened to your car?” I asked.
“We think the battery died. Can you give us a jump start?”
“Do you have jumper cables?”
“Oh yes! Yes! We do! Will you help us?”
Now let me break in at this point to size-up the situation for you. First, I had already established that this probably wasn’t some elaborate scheme to harm me or trick me. Their body language was tense and stressed, not nervous and jumpy like someone lying would have been. They all looked me in the eye and didn’t exhibit signs of either aggression or deception. Second, once I felt the situation was safe, leaving and not helping them would have been kind of silly. It was a pretty isolated stretch of road so it would’ve been a while before someone else stopped or before Law Enforcement or AAA would have arrived. Third, I felt like doing something good for someone else for a change.
“Sure I’ll help you.”
“OH! Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!!” They all shouted.
“It’s my pleasure.” (You can take the Cliff out of Chick-Fil-A but you can’t take the Chick-Fil-A out of Cliff.)
“We’ve been here for so long! Thank you so much! You saved us!”
“I didn’t save you guys, you saved yourselves.” (How many times have I seen that movie?)”If you hadn’t kept trying to flag people down…”
And so I pulled my car around and positioned in front of theirs while they opened their trunk (I kept a careful eye our for tire irons, shotguns, dead bodies and nunchucks) and pulled out the jumper cables. Hoods were opened cables were attached and after a few revs of Black Stallion’s 178 Horses their car had started up after a few turns of the key.
Then something happened that I didn’t expect…
“Thank you so much! I am going to give you a hug!” Said the girl.
“What?” I asked.
“Can I give you a hug for your helping us?” She asked excitedly.
“Well…”
“We’ll all give you a hug! You saved us!” Said the two guys.”
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot!
I, a complete stranger, was now being offered three hugs from three skinny Asian people, for simply pulling over and helping out. The time it took from when I first spotted them to the time I’d be back on the road was less than 10 minutes and yet they felt it necessary to offer hugs in gratitude of my measly help.
What in the world was wrong with them?
You don’t just hug a complete stranger for so little a sacrifice! You have to build up to a hug! Especially from three people at once! But here they were offering a small token of their affection for a stranger helping out in a time of need. Assessing the situation again, I decided I would accept the hugs one at a time.
After the hugging was over, and I felt like I was an old friend saying goodbye, they got in their car thanking me all the way, and I got in my car wondering why I was so shocked by what had just happened.
You see most people would have just said thanks, maybe they would have shook your hand and that would be that. No hugs, little gratitude and very little emotion on either part. At best you may get a few dollars for your trouble. At worst you’d get some crazy psycho that’s tying to murder you…
But a hug is very personal. It involves physical contact and is usually reserved for people that you know pretty well and have some sort of relationship with: friendship, courtship, family etc. But they were strangers and in all likelihood I will never see them again in this lifetime. So why did it tangle me up inside?
Because they helped me, more than I helped them.
They helped me to see that doing something nice for someone isn’t an obligation, isn’t a requirement and certainly isn’t a means of salvation. It’s an opportunity.
It’s an opportunity to take a risk.
It’s an opportunity to show grace.
It’s an opportunity to experience a taste of heaven down here on Earth.
Because in heaven we will be hugging and spending all of eternity with people that are complete strangers and yet, we’ll all have the same focus: Jesus. But down here on earth, we don’t all have the same focus and we are sojourners in a temporary place.
[34] You shall treat the stranger who sojourns with you as the native among you, and you shall love him as yourself, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt: I am the LORD your God.
-Leviticus 19:34 ESV
Just as the Israelites were sojourners in Egypt, so we all (Christian or non-Christian) are sojourners here on Earth waiting for Deliverance and Redemption. It will ALWAYS be the exception to the rule when you show kindness to a fellow sojourner and it will ALWAYS be the exception when you are shown kindness by a fellow sojourner.
I was shocked to be shown kindness by those three folks on the road and in some ways it’s intimidating and in honest ways it’s convicting. It’s intimidating because they set the bar really high for when I show kindness to those that have shown me kindness. And it’s convicting because I can’t believe the bar was so low before.
So the next time you see someone stranded on the side of the road, remember this:
[1] Let brotherly love continue. [2] Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares.
-Hebrews 13:1-2 ESV
Dude